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Why Saying “Not Good Enough” Hinders Your Online Dating

Why Saying “Not Good Enough” Hinders Your Online Dating


Online dating is regarded as the most effective way of finding love these days. The popularity of matchmaking services is without a doubt thanks to the high level of convenience and the plethora of possibilities they open up. Dating apps such as eHarmony, OkCupid or Match.com have millions of users, and the bigger the pool, the more likely you’ll have a catch. However, one of the biggest pitfalls for any online dater is becoming picky. While most people state they are open for any relationship that is based on mutual love, they tend to nitpick as time goes on. You must understand that even if a little thing bothers you in your partner’s attitude, you must either learn to live with it or work together to iron out the differences.

Why saying “not good enough” hinders your online dating

The root of being picky

Being finicky materializes in the following way: you skip through the list of recommended dates offered by the matchmaking engine until you spot someone attractive. The basic info seems promising too: the person lives close to you, shares the same hobbies etc. You get in touch with your potential date and chat a little bit, but when it comes to the first real life date you back off, convincing yourself he or she isn’t the one for you. “They are just not good enough” you conclude. Setting up high expectations is one thing, but not being sure of what the actual problem is and yet still giving up on a relationship is quite another. There are several reasons why singles act like this. Not being aware of your own expectations is one of them.

You see, lonely singles state they only want someone who cares for them, but deep inside their heart they have a huge list of qualities they want to see in their partner. The other reason why daters throw away perfectly good matches is because someone else struck their eye. Though it could be also possible that they are just afraid to commit themselves to a relationship, and they convince themselves by finding small mistakes in their date.

Consider giving a second chance

Confronting your inner self and defeating the urge of being overly choosy is a great way to increase your chances on dating sites. This way you will not only have longer lasting dates, but also avoid angry arguments over partners you dumped for apparently no reason. Every time you feel the thought of “not good enough” slipping inside your mind, make sure to take a deep breath and think of the situation again. You have every right to reject the approach of someone who doesn’t live up to your standards, but does the other person have qualities that are important enough to compensate for that? Maybe giving someone a second chance will pay off in the long-term.


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